Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Marriage as Sacrifice

Saturday, I went to catechitical training in Amarillo. The subject was morality. During the course of the 3 hour seminar, Father Neusch referred to the sacrament of marriage as a sacrifice. He pointed out that, when you marry, you MUST sacrifice a whole lot of other things - and people.

I had not considered that. I grew up in the Disney era of "happily ever after" and truly believed it. I also grew up knowing that marriage, like the other sacraments, is a gift from God, instituted by His son, our Lord, Jesus Christ. I looked at marriage as a gift, a blessing, and the answer to all my girlhood prayers.

I was often, and sorely, disappointed.

I do not now, nor have I ever, physically cheated on my spouse. I have flirted and I have failed, often, to put my spouse's legitimate needs ahead of my own. I am not suggesting, nor was Father, to put our spouse's immoral, unholy, or illegal needs ahead of our own. I guess that I am talking more, at least in my case, about the small, everyday things. I know that I could have been more generous of spirit, more courteous, more mindful of my spouse's emotional, spiritual, and physical needs.

I know this will not come as a shock to those of you who truly know me, but I can be very selfish, sarcastic (and yes, Julie, I hear you laughing -sarcastically, I might add) and not very nice. I am, though, less selfish, sarcastic and mean than I used to be. It is a struggle.

When I was young and something bad happened, the nuns told us, always and often, to "offer it up to God". By doing so, we would be sharing, in the suffering that Jesus endured when He was here on earth. I just never thought about offering up my marriage to God.

I will now.

Thank you, Father.


Sayre said...

Marriage can be both those things - sacrifice AND blessing. I confess I don't always consider my husband's needs first either. And he doesn't consider mine first - which sometimes leads to some serious grumpiness. We are now in the habit of checking in with each other - do you need to go to work or can I go for a bike ride for an hour and a half? I'm working late, can you see to dinner? They seem like very little things, but those little things add up to the very fabric of how well and happily we live together. We're working on it. We just hadn't realized that we needed to.

Richard said...

Never thought about it that way.

Pamela said...

Thanks Sandy... The young folk just don't understand this. (Not that I do -- but I know that it is true)

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